Saturday, February 13, 2010

I figured it out...I have no idea what's going on at all.

Either I haven't processed things well in the past or over the last couple years my ability to process has diminished. There is also a high possibility I just think things through a bit differently now. Over the last two weeks or so I have encountered so much that I don't even know where to begin processing. And as of now I can think of two options--put up a wall and become numb or leave. Now I know my problems will follow me and no matter where I go the world is still fallen but there is something about leaving that gives me a fresh perspective.

The capacity to work through everything is certainly not within me but the question becomes: Do you ask the God to walk you through things so you can feel them and think them and move along? That seems like it's going to be painful. In fact, I know it will be painful. Do you take the road of righteousness and choose to follow after God rather than put up a road block and some blinders? Now all these questions seem obvious but I think if we are truly being honest with our pain we know the latter sounds better (short-term at least).

I have no inspiring way to close other than to hope that someone else has tips they would like to share.